Happy Valentines Valentine

As I sit here and stare across the back yard at the house that was once our home, I cannot help but remember your face.

This day is a particularly difficult one. As the world around us celebrates their love, I sit here with a hole in my heart that is your heart.

The pain doesn't stop unless I sleep. When I sleep, you're there. You're still the woman who walks with me in my dreams. As I hold your hand and walk through the clouds over Talimena Drive, you look to me and smile. You smile that infectious smile of a fleeting lover. In your smile I try to meditate, and make the world stop. Because I do not want to lose that moment.

I sit and think of all the things we might do on a day like this. Such a beautiful Saturday Valentine. 70 degrees, sunny. We'd have probably driven to the lake with the top down and talked about life at a concrete picnic table.

If only I'd have known that your love for me came with an expiration date, I'd have kissed you longer, hugged you tighter, and held you closer....all of those times. The best five years of my life times. The hardest five years of my life times.

Instead I sit here. I sit on this couch wrapped in a blanket that was once ours. One that we slept under so many cold winter nights when the heater didnt work. Instead I sit here.....and wish you a happy Valentines valentine.


Kyle